As a recovering people pleaser, I am slowly learning this. Which, as a parent and stepparent, is incredibly hard. Between societal pressure, family pressures, and pressure from friends, someone always has an opinion about something you are doing wrong. You have to do what you feel is right for you and your family.
As a stepparent, people will tell you that you have to treat the stepkids like your own, but don’t make them feel like you’re trying to replace their biomom, but you have to be like a fun aunt/uncle. They will say the nastiest things about you if you do anything that society thinks isn’t in the best interest of the kids. I have been with my husband since 2017 and have been a stepmom since then as well.
Gentle parenting, old school parenting, permissive parenting. There are so many ways to parent a child, and every type will wind up upsetting someone. You have to just ignore them and do what is absolutely best for them. I love my family dearly, but sometimes my mom and sister can be judgmental about things that they don’t agree with. In the begnning of my relationship with my husband and bonus son, they insisted I treat him like my own when his mom was still involved in his life. My mom and my sister’s rationale was bc my sister and I were both adopted that I should treat my bonus son that way. Except that those are different situations. Then they disagreed when we pulled my bonus son from public school, where he was academically and emotionally struggling. We did what was best for his future education and his emotional well being. He now goes to an online charter school where he is thriving. The calls from school have now become positive versus the almost daily negative ones we were getting.
It is hard these days with A-side stories constantly being posted on social media, and so many voices telling you what to-do and not to-do. You just have to hold your head high and do your own thing. Ignore the haters, you know what is best for your family.
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